Jenny Jones: Brilliant and intelligent women unable to get dates?

Yesterday evening, I was paging through my TiVo’s “Now Playing List” when I found that my faithful Tivo (who was well aware of my preference for shoows like Buffy, Farscape, Hogan’s Heroes, Star Trek, etc.) had somehow decided that I might like Jenny Jones, which appears to be a daylight talk show. Oh, the shame — must find the thumbs down button on my remote fast!

Anyway, the particular Jenny Jones show which the TiVo had recorded had the description, “Beautiful and intelligent women say they are unable to get dates.” Against my better judgement, I hit the play button. This was partially with the same kind of macabre fascination that draws onlookers to fatal car crashes; but it was also partially because I had trouble believing that smart and pretty women would really have problems finding dates. After all, I’ve been looking for one who’d be willing put up for me for quite a while, and from what I can tell, most of the smart and pretty women in the Boston area are either (a) taken, or (b) have no problem finding dates whatsoever.

The feeling that I might volunteer to help these poor souls quickly died, however, the moment they were called on stage. Were they beautiful? Perhaps, if you like the huge-amounts-of-makeup look. And there was no denying that they were extremely large-busted, although I wasn’t entirely sure they were all natural.

But then the quizmaster, who was dressed in stereotypical geek costume (complete with masking tape on his glasses), came on and started asking questions to “prove” that these allegedly college-educated women were actually smart. Questions like: “What’s the square root of 64?” and “What does the acronym CPR stand for?” — both of which one of the women couldn’t answer!

What was worse, however, was the woman who was declared smart because she was able to successfully manage to answer the questions: “What does the E.P.A — as in the federal agency — stand for?” and “What natural resource is used to make paper”?

I weep for the state of American culture.